A few weeks ago, I was making dinner in the kitchen when my daughter came and asked me for a small bowl. Figuring she couldn’t do much damage with a little one, I gave it over to her. She quickly ran to the bathroom, ran the water briefly, then came out- no bowl in sight. I wondered what she was up to. Then she ran out in the backyard, went into a flower bed, then went back to the bathroom. After a few more trips to the backyard, I was pretty curious so I followed her into the bathroom. On the counter was a small bowl of water filled with honeysuckle, phlox and geranium petals. When I asked what she was doing, she proudly stated “I’m making perfume!”

It’s easy at a time like this to see the puddles on the sink, the flower petals on the floor and the dirt she tracked in from the yard and get mad. After all, who does she think cleans up the mess? What was she thinking? Then it dawned on me – my kid is practicing science! She is conducting her own experiment, just for the pleasure of finding the result!

A few days after that, my son was eating a bowl of soup. As he worked on the soup, he would periodically drop things into it: bits of cracker, apple slices, whatever he could find. Again, my first reaction was to look at the splashes, the food he was wasting, the mess on his shirt. But again, he was conducting research- seeing what things would float, what would sink, and what would still taste good (turns out apples in soup are great!).

Now that I understand that the goal of some (it’s up to us moms to draw the line) mess-making is simply to see what will happen, I try to keep a more open mind. I know how tiny my son can cut up paper. I know how long it takes to empty the toy box. I know what my driveway looks like after the kids paint it with mud. With all these experiences, my kids are discovering things about themselves and how things work in the world around them, which is worth a lot of Pine-Sol. (They are also getting pretty good at using a broom.) Also, when we do activities like cook together or paint, by making a mess, they are learning how NOT to make a mess (practice makes perfect).

And you know what? Honeysuckle, phlox and geranium petals smell really great together!